Simple things

Some days are easier to look forward to because they have obvious elements of happiness:  being with friends, going to a concert, eating at a favorite restaurant, etc.  However, today was a good example where I had nothing particularly exciting planned, it was just an ordinary day...

While I would prefer to be in my cozy habitat all day in the middle of a snowstorm, there is nothing like having to get a physical and picking up shoes at Jim's on 59th Street while slipping and sliding to bring reality in.  Still inspired though because the constant interruption by what's real and what is in the now is actually very instructive.  If we pay attention and are conscious we are constantly getting messages from what surrounds us.

As I was on my way to the doctor in a bus, the handicap contraption stopped working after an older lady in a wheelchair got in.  While she was getting on - since it takes a few minutes - I was thinking how much I admired her, going around in a wheelchair  all over New York by herself and I was also thinking that we don't know how we will measure up to all the various tests in life.  I never think I can step up to any tragedy or unfortunate event in life but then I am reminded - mostly by others - that when it's necessary I do it and I do it well.   Maybe I don't think I can deal with anything that's heavy duty because I still have vestiges of the very pampered little girl I was some years ago.  The lady in the wheelchair obviously stepped up to her reality - at least on the surface - because she seemed completely comfortable, cracking jokes with the bus driver while zipping in the bus in her red motorized wheelchair and into the blue handicapped section.

Whenever I see anyone on a wheelchair I think about my mother.  Even though she adapted to it and mostly mastered it, she struggled through the whole process of being ill and being in a wheelchair.  My mother loved to dance and move around.  She was very gregarious, incredibly smart and witty, and had a tremendous amount of energy.  She had an indomitable spirit and was very strong throughout her relatively short illness but she could no longer dance nor move comfortably.  She was like a beautiful bird that was just put in a cage, shocked by the experience and trying to get out.

Maybe that's why I will break out in a dance in a supermarket, in the street or anywhere the spirit moves me for that matter.  I can also start singing at the sound of music just as easily as some of my friends may attest!  I was recently asked to return to a store the following day to sing while a Freddie Mercury CD was playing.  Funny.

Back to the bus.  Once the handicap contraption stops working, it takes the bus driver 15 minutes to get it working again.  That is a long time when you are trying to make it on time to a doctor's appointment with only a 15-minute buffer but decided to go with the flow and not get impatient.  A girl started complaining and cursing and was obviously upset.  Why get upset?  At whom?  At the bus driver?  At the bus manufacturer?  At choosing this bus instead of another?  At the lady in the wheelchair?  At God?

There are many instances in life where blaming someone or something is easier than accepting what is happening for what it is.  I am guilty of that just like anyone else but try to be conscious about it so that I don't fall prey to it as often as in the past. I go through a process of asking myself how getting upset will solve the situation and go from there.  When my emotions get the best of me I turn into a journalist, I attempt and mostly succeed at looking at the situation as a reporter so that I can report on what is going on by looking at it in a more detached way.

After the bus got fixed, I get to the doctor on time and as part of the physical, a male nurse that was giving me a flu vaccine and that I never met before asks me why I am not married, that I should be married.  I was wondering if he was flirting with me or whether he felt all women should be married or what.  My reply that I preferred to have a boyfriend than a husband made him laugh.  He then said "You know you are beautiful, don't you?  You could be married."  Now I thought he was definitely flirting.  I told him I liked things simple and being single was simpler than being married as that complicated matters significantly which made him laugh even more.  He also asked me what would I say if someone asked me to be married.  I told him that my response would be "Please don't do me any favors" - we both laughed at that.

That simple interaction about nonsense added light and warmth to a very cold day.  Later, more simple things like having french onion soup in a charming french cafe, seeing the beautiful white snowflakes against the dark bark of the trees, and admiring the colorful spring clothes already in the store windows were all that was necessary to make today another great day in New York.